final song

My Love

Sitting here thinking
On the changes
That God
Put me through
When life seemed empty
When I'd just
Given up on hope
There you were
Your bright smile
Lighting up the world

Chorus
And I thank you
For all you've done
You showed me the right way
You brighten each bad day
Spreading love
To everyone you knew


Why did you leave
Why couldn't you stay here
I know you're in a better place
But I miss you everyday
Regret inside
But all memories still alive
In my heart
You'll always be
Everything
And more to me





Analysis for song
"Sarah! Shayla! Where are you two rascal children?" Footsteps came nearer as the shadow slowly transformed into the familiar body of my grandma. Her large glasses embellished her nose as her kind eyes showed a sign of relief that we were ok. A chubby finger from hands that reflected many years of hard work was pointed directly at my cousin and I. "Get down from there, you'll get hurt!"
"Shay made me," I was quick to find a way out, but my grandma didn't buy it. "Sarah, don't lie or we will have to wash your mouth out with soap and Shay, stop biting your nails or I'll put chili pepper sauce on them." My grandma put up a tough front though we knew she was soft inside. "Now get studying, you can play after you're done." We climbed down and walked to the table to study as my grandma went back to the kitchen to cook dinner. The smell of fresh garlic bread, ripe tomato sauce and buttery noodles arose letting me know that dinner was ready.
Right as I was ready to eat, I heard a car pull up onto the driveway. "Sarah lets go." I recognized the familiar voice of my dad standing outside the house, the truck on and rumbling, ready to take me home. "Here, take this," my grandma said as she handed me a large pot with spaghetti noodles and a large plastic container filled with the delectable sauce. "Hurry, don't make your father wait." She said rushing me out of the house. "Thanks grandma, BYE SHAY!" I yelled to my cousin and gave my grandma a hug, then ran to the truck to go home. I looked out of the dashboard window as I saw my grandma standing outside the house waving and smiling as I rolled down the window to wave goodbye.



FIVE YEARS LATER
"Dad, is it time?" I overheard my aunty asking my grandpa as we all hovered over a single hospital bed that was in the Critical Care Unit of Queens hospital. "Yeah, I guess so," I heard him solemnly answer. "But let the kids say goodbye."
"Cass, Gi, Shay, say bye to grandma." My aunty started tearing, but not as bad as my mom.
"Yeah, Jess, Kris, Sarah, you guys too, tell grandma how much you loved her," my mother managed to get the words out between sobs. One by one, we looked at grandma's beautiful face, a face of kindness and love. When it was my turn, I slowly approached the bed, not sure of what to say. "I love you grandma, I am so sorry I didn't say that more. Thank you for everything that you have ever done. I'll see you in heaven." The words sort of naturally slipped out as I tried to hold back tears that kept coming out.
The nurse slowly took her breathing machine away, causing her to stop breathing. I watched as her heart rate monitor moved from 100 to 90 slowly to 10. Nothing that ever happened before in my life could have prepared me for that one moment. Finally at zero, I couldn't stand it. It felt like I couldn't breathe, like everything good was bad, like there was a huge hole in my heart.
My grandma, Sheila Kikue Yamashiro, died on August 15, 2007 at age 77.

The person that I used as an inspiration to write this song was my grandma. I tried writing about a number of other things, like the beach, friends, or summer but in the end, it all came back to her. Nothing else seemed to matter as much. The whole song isn't one big memory; instead it's just basically about how she was always such a good friend, and a good person to me. How she is one of the main people who shaped my life and has truly "saved" me in so many ways.
I wrote about my grandma's death in the song saying "Why did you leave, why couldn't you stay here, I know you're in a better place, but I miss you everyday". I also wrote, "Regret inside, but all memories still alive" because there are a lot of things that I regret not doing. I regret not seeing her more as I grew older, missing church with her because of basketball, not saying thank you and fully appreciating her or saying I love you enough.
The main point for my song was to get all my emotions and feelings out about my grandma. I think that the she has been the main thing on my mind for a long time, especially since it was the first death that I've ever had to deal with. But after writing this and living without her for a while, I think it made me a much stronger person. Its like what George Santayana said, "There is no cure for birth and death save to enjoy the interval." You can't do anything to stop the natural process of dying, so you will have to eventually learn how to deal with it. And you should live life to the fullest because none of us are guaranteed a tomorrow.


Reflection
This project was interesting to make. Especially since I didnt have any previous experience with something like this. I would have to say that it was easier than i thought it would be, but it still took time to complete. I guess i am proud of how my song turned out, because i imagined it a LOT worse. I think its cool to see the many different things that people wrote about. Its like an easy way to seeing into people's thoughts. in the end, i enjoyed doing this project and learned a lot about myself and what i am thinking.